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disclosures; gradually moving through deeper levels of intimacy; so long as each level is
mutually satisfying。 The final level of intimacy that is achieved will depend on the needs and
interpersonal skills of the two people involved。 In some cases; the relationship will stop at a more
superficial level。 In others; it will continue to grow and deepen。
According to Jourard (1964); there is an optimal level of self…disclosure for any healthy; well…
adjusted individual。 A person who never discloses will not be able to have close; meaningful
relationships with other individuals。 Conversely; a person who goes too far by disclosing
everything to anyone who will listen is viewed as maladjusted and excessively self…centered。
Ideally (according to Jourard); one should disclose a moderate amount of personal information to
most acquaintances and reveal a lot about oneself to a very few close friends。
Trust; as displayed through disclosure; is a major dimension in human fears of rejection; ridicule;
and betrayal that haunt relationships。 Trust washes away the fears of rejection; ridicule; and
betrayal that haunt the existence of many。 Trust paves the road to friendship and intimacy; it is at
the core of love for another person and the acceptance of oneself
A climate of trust can be established by doing the following:
。 Make it acceptable for other people to talk openly about themselves。
。 Reciprocate with your own openness。
。 Express support and unconditional acceptance of your loved ones; although you may
disapprove of some of their specific behaviors (make them aware of this difference)。
。 Be consistent but not rigid in your standards; values; and behavior。
。 Be available to listen; express warmth; and empathize; even when you do not have
an answer or a solution。
。 Do not make promises you do not intend to keep or cannot deliver。
347
PSYCHOLOGY AND LIFE
You Only Get One Chance to Make a First Impression
First impressions can have a lasting effect on how we see others and on how they see us。 Some
researchers claim that first impressions are typically formed within the first 8 to 10 seconds of
first seeing someone; often before they ever actually speak to us or shake our hand。 In those first
few seconds; we appear to “size up” the person according to their physical appearance; their eye
contact; their facial expressions; their manner of dress; their body language; and their overall
demeanor。 Then we pare our perceptions of the person to our previous experiences with
others of similar demeanor; etc。; and develop a “thumbnail sketch” of what type of person we
believe this person is。 Much of this is done unconsciously and automatically。 But once formed; it
can be difficult to change。 Because of our tendency to selectively perceive only the aspects of the
person’s behavior that fit our first impression; the person will have to behave in a manner that is
pervasively and enduringly inconsistent with our impression before we will change it。
Additionally; since the way we behave toward the person can affect the way he or she behaves
toward us; our first impression may cause us to behave in ways that almost guarantee a response
that fits our first impression。 This results in a “self…fulfilling prophecy” which makes it unlikely
that we will ever significantly change our impression of the person。
It is for these reasons that making a good first impression; or at least a neutral first impression;
can be so important。 In a situation such as a job interview; in which you may have only 20 or 30
minutes to interact with the interviewer; there is usually not enough time to overe a negative
first impression。 Recruiters have told me that something as simple as the way an interviewee
shakes his or her hands can sometimes leave a lasting impression that positively or negatively
affects the remainder of the interview。
After reviewing the power of first impressions; you might want to have students generate ways
they can pursue self…enhancement and other…enhancement strategies in order to try and create as
positive a first impression as possible。
BIOGRAPHICAL PROFILES
Solomon Asch (1907 —1996)
Solomon Asch obtained his Ph。D。 at Columbia University in 1932。 He subsequently taught at the
New School for Social Research in New York City and at Rutgers University。 Asch’s research and
conceptual orientation in social psychology were influenced strongly by the Gestalt school;
particularly as represented in the writings of his close friend; Max Wertheimer。 Asch is best
known for his pioneering research on conformity and the effects of group pressure on the
behavior of the individual。 Among his major works is the classic text Social Psychology; published
in 1952。
Leon Festinger (b。 1919)
Born in New York City; Festinger obtained both his M。A。 and Ph。D。 at the State University of
Iowa。 He taught at various schools; including Iowa; Rochester; MIT; the University of Minnesota;
and Stanford University。 In 1968; he joined the New School for Social Research in New York City。
Believing that humans are thinking animals desiring to bring order to life; Festinger argued that
people often make special efforts to reduce cognitive inconsistencies。 His theory of cognitive
dissonance; proposed in 1957; was of immense influence in social psychology; inspiring volumes
of research during the 1950s and 1960s。
348
CHAPTER 17: SOCIAL PROCESSES AND RELATIONSHIPS
Kurt Lewin (1890—1947)
Kurt Lewin grew up in prewar Germany in an era that produced a number of prominent and
revolutionary psychologists。 Best known for his field theory of psychology; which attempts to
explain human behavior in terms of the interrelations of environmental and psychological
elements acting on the individual; Lewin has contributed a body of thought that has had a great
impact on such disciplines as social psychology; industrial psychology; and personality theory。
Lewin was born in a small village in the Prussian province of Posen in 1890。 His father owned a
large general store there and maintained his family in relative fort。 In order to expand his
business; Herr Lewin moved his wife and four children to Berlin in 1905; where Kurt pleted
his secondary education。 Lewin entered the University of Freiburg; intent on studying medicine;
but; within a short time; he discovered that the field held little interest for him。 He underwent a
period of vacillation; during which he struggled to decide the direction in which he should
channel his considerable energies。 His search led him first to transfer to the University of Munich
and then back to Berlin; where he eventually took his basic degree in psychology and embarked
on a course of graduate study in that discipline。 At this time; Lewin came under the tutelage of
Professor Carl Stumpf; a prominent experimental psychologist; who advised and encouraged
him in his research。
Just as he pleted his requirements for a Ph。D。 in 1914; Lewin was conscripted into the
German army as an infantryman。 He served in the military for the next four years; so
distinguishing himself that he rose from private to lieutenant in a short time。 At the close of the
war; Lewin returned to the University of Berlin as both instructor and research assistant in the
Psychological Institute。 He rapidly gained a reputation as a superb lecturer in the classroom and
an excellent supervisor in the laboratory。
Of particular importance to the development of Lewin’s thought at this time was the alliance he
formed with two of his colleagues at the university; Max Wertheimer and Wolfgang Kohler。
These two had participated in the founding of Gestalt psychology and; while Lewin never
became a Gestalt psychologist; the connection between that approach and Lewin’s field theory
approach is immediately apparent。 Eventually Lewin was appointed full professor at the
university; where he and his graduate students generated numerous insightful research papers。
As Lewin’s prominence in the German academic world continued to grow; so too did the power
of the Nazi Party。 Lewin was sp