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高山上的呼喊-go tell it on the mountain-第3章

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gation; but the freedom to enter theworld outside; and freedom from the hatreds of the family kitchen。 ‘And this because Florence’sdeep ambition: to walk out one morning through the cabin door; never to return。’ But the novelknows there is a price to be paid for this too。 Elizabeth; a long time away from the South; enjoyedwalking in Central Park; because ‘it recreated something of the landscape she had known’。
  Baldwin never got over his religious crisis at the age of fourteen。 He didn’t forget。 ‘Thatsummer。’ he writes in The Fire Next Time; ‘all the fears with which I had grown up; and whichwere now a part of me and controlled my vision of the world; rose up like a wall between theworld and me; and drove me into the church。’ He surrendered to a spiritual seduction; falling downbefore the altar; and thereafter preaching for three years。 Baldwin recalls his father one dayslapping his face; ‘and in that moment everything flooded back – all the hatred and all the fear; andthe depth of a merciless resolve to kill my father rather than allow my father to kill me – and Iknew that all those sermons and tears and all that repentance and rejoicing had changed nothing’。
  Baldwin put the essence of all of this into Go Tell it on the Mountain。 Gabriel has thepreacher’s traditional love of helplessness; and traditional anger in the face of self…sufficiency。 Yetthe central issues of Gabriel’s life are his hypocrisy; and the sexual desire that acpanies therejoicing of religious life。 His treatment of Esther bines the two (‘I guess it takes a holy man tomake a girl a real whore;’ she say) but only Florence seems aware of the truth after Ester is dead。
  At the close of the novel she seeks to name the tree by its fruit。 And John; who is not strange fruitof that tree; might live to curse all lies and go free into the world。
  Baldwin; all his writing; insisted he wrote only from experience。 That was the kind ofwriter he was: he meant every word。 There would always be something of the pulpit on Baldwin’swriting; and something too of the threshing floor。 Go Tell It on the Mountain is a beautiful;enduring; spiritual song of a novel; a gush of life from a haunted American church。 Like manywriters with a religious past; the young man who wrote this novel was stranded in the space between his own body and the body of Christ; and strung between the father he hated and theFather who might offer him salvation。 John Grimes finds the beginning of his redemption in thevery place where his father lived out his hypocrisy; the church; where Gabriel spawned so much ofthe trouble in their lives。 Here; at last; after all is said and done; John Grimes can go in search ofthe Everlasting; ‘over his father’s head to Heaven – to the Father who loved him’。
  Andrew O’HaganAndrew O’Hagan was born in Glasgow in 1968。 He is the author of The Missing; a bookabout missing persons; and Our Fathers; a novel shortlisted for the Booker Prize; a WhitbreadAward; the John Llewellyn Rhys Prize and the IMPAC Dublin International Literary Award。 He isa contributing editor to the London Review of Books。
  For My Father and Mother They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength;they shall mount up with wings like eagles;they shall turn and not be weary;they shall walk and not faint。
Part 1 The Seventh Day
And the Spirit and the bride say;e。 And let him that heareth saye。 And let him that is athirste。 And whosoever will; let himtake the water of life freely。
  I looked down the line;    And I wondered   Everyone had always said that John would be a preacher when he grew up; just like his father。 Ithas been so often that John; without ever thinking about it; had e to believe it himself。 Notuntil the morning of his fourteenth birthday did he really begin to think about it; and by then it wasalready too late。
  His earliest memories—which were in a way; his only memories—were of the hurry andbrightness of Sunday mornings。 They all rose together on that day; his father; who did not have togo to work; and led them in prayer before breakfast; his mother; who dressed up on that day; andlooked almost young; with her hair straightened; and on her head the close…fitting white cap thatwas the uniform of holy women; his younger brother; Roy; who was silent that day because hisfather was home。 Sarah; who wore a red ribbon in her hair that day; and was fondled by her father。
  And the baby; Ruth; who was dressed in pink and white; and rode in her mother’s arms to church。
  The church was not very far away; four block up Lenox Avenue; on a corner not far fromthe hospital。 It was to this hospital that his mother had gone when Roy; and Sarah; and Ruth wereborn。 John did not remember very clearly the first time she had gone; to have Roy; folks said thathe had cried and carried on the whole time his mother was away; he remembered only enough tobe afraid every time her belly began to swell; knowing that each time the swelling began it wouldnot end until she was taken from him; to e back with an stranger。 Each time this happened shebecame a little more of a stranger herself。 She would soon be going away again; Roy said—heknew much more about such things than John。 John had observed his mother closely; seeing no swelling yet; but his father had prayed one morning for the ‘little voyager soon to be among them;’
  and so John knew that Roy spoke the truth。
  Every Sunday morning; then; since John could remember; they had taken to the Streets; theGrimes family on their way to church。 Sinners along the avenue watched tem—men still wearingtheir Sunday…night clothes; wrinkled and dusty now; muddy…eyed and muddy…faced; and thewomen with harsh voices and tight; bright dresses; cigarettes between their finger or held tightly inthe corners of their mouths。 They talked; and laughed; and fought together; and the women foughtlike the men。 John and Roy; passing these men and women; looked at one another briefly; Johnembarrassed and Roy amused。 Roy would be like them when he grew up; if the Lord did notchange his heart。 These men and women they passed on Sunday mornings had spent the night inbars; or in cat houses; or on the streets; or on the rooftops; or under the stairs。 They had beendrinking。 They had gone from cursing to laughter; to anger; to lust。 Once he and Roy had watcheda man and woman in the basement of a condemned house。 They did it standing up。 The womanhad wanted fifty cents; and the man had flashed a razor。
  John had never watched again; he had been afraid。 But Roy had watched them many times;and he told John he had done it with some girls down the block。
  And his mother and father; who went to church on Sundays; they did it too; and sometimesJohn heard them in the bedroom behind him; over the sound of rat’s feet; and rat screams; and themusic and cursing from the harlot’s house downstairs。
  Their church was called the Temple of the Fire Baptized。 It was not the biggest church inHarlem; not yet the smallest; but John had been brought up to believe it was the holiest and best。
  His father was head deacon in this church—there were only two; the other a round; black mannamed Deacon Braithwaite—and he took up the collection; and sometimes he preached。 Thepastor; Father James; was a genial; well…fed man with a face like a darker moon。 It was he whopreached on Pentecost Sundays; and led revivals in the summer…time; and anointed and healed thesick。
  On Sunday mornings and Sunday nights the church was always full; on special Sundays itwas full all day。 The Grimes family arrived in a body; always a little late; usually in the middle ofSunday school; which began at nine o’clock。 This lateness was always their mother’s fault—atleast in the eyes of their father; she could not seem to get herself and the children ready on time;ever; and sometimes she actually remained behind; not to appear until the morning service。 Whenthey all arrived together; they separated upon entering the doors; father and mother going to sit inthe Adult Class; which was taught by Sister McCandless; Sarah going to the Infants’ Class; Johnand Roy sitting in the Intermediate; which was taught by Brother Elisha。
  When he was young; John had paid 
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